3/8 05 Dear Baduzunguvu

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I write to you all today, because I don't know what else to do. It is not because today is any different from all other days. They are all the same. I didn't get enough sleep, came to late up, still dizzy, and there is another text message from one of my past girlfriends. I am thinking of calling her, but I have become so superstitious that I do not dare. I am afraid of what might happen. In generel I have become frightened. I am scared of every step I am about to take. I have stopped to believe in other people. I am jealous of any woman I meet. Everything she does give me pain. She does it on purpose to hurt me. I am trapped in her mistery. She walks to me and begins to hit me. After a while her hands are filled with blood. It is my only defence against her. My blood will infect her and one day make her stop. That is the relief I will wait for. The only hope that can ease my pain. The desire I feel for her is so much stronger than the pain she pushes on my flesh. Tomorrow I will resurrect without her.
Regards from white tarmac roads.

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